in Family, Lifestyle, Uncategorized

5 Things to Selfishly Improve Yourself

Every once in a while you need to get out of your day-to-day and escape into something that will actually benefit your future self.

I’m all for catching up on season 3 of whatever, watching the train wreck of the new series of ratchet tv, or being immersed into the characters in my beloved romance novels.

None of those make you or I better, well except maybe to think how grateful we are that we aren’t them. But what about being as addicted to doing things that are actually going to inspire, educate, empower, or help you to become a better person?

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in Inspiration, Lifestyle

Stop Feeding Self-doubt With Your What If’s

Just wondering if you’ve ever been in a what if debate with yourself.  You know the type of debate that holds your aspirations hostage. You have an idea or dream to go for a certain goal you want to attain, be it starting a business, applying for a job even as simple as purchasing a gift for someone you love.  The what if debate talks us out of the desires of our hearts by simply weighing the outcome of things on the negative side of if.  For example: “I want to start a book club but what if no one joins”.  I thought about this a little further and realized that what if has more than likely been the demise of many great ideas.  I have a challenge for you and the what if’s in your life. For the next week try to assume every if is positive.  Here’s what I mean, take the example above, “what if I start a book club and have numerous members”.  Here are 3 tips that’ll help you redirect your negative what if thoughts.

  1. Recognize when the negative if’s thoughts are happening
  2. Picture yourself in the midst of the exact scenario if the idea happened just how you desired
  3. Push past the fear and take action anyway.

Don’t get me wrong, there will be times when things don’t go the way you plan, however, if you never try it’ll never go the way you plan.  Don’t allow what if’s to paralyze your dreams, goals, and aspirations instead allow them to be the fuel to move you to go after everything you want.

I want us to stay connected so click here to visit my website and join my mailing list.

Until next allow your What If’s to be positive and be dope!

in Business, Inspiration, Lifestyle

Selfishly Start Working On You NOW!

Only you know where you want the rest of the year to go. Start reflecting on what you were able to accomplish this year, what went well, what you just didn’t make time for or get to. What promises didn’t you keep to yourself? Are you committed to doing them now? Great. You know things like leaving all that negativity behind, being aware of who is really down for you and deciding what’s best for you. You know positive thoughts and actions breed positive results.

Start with these 3 things to start working on you:

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in Family, Inspiration, Lifestyle

Their Abilities v/s Your Expectations

Without even trying expectations are placed on people that they may not be able to satisfy.  There is this notion that people ought know certain things and for this reason many individuals are left disappointed.  The one term that really aggravates me is “common sense”. But common sense for who, by who and according to who.  Truth be told common sense differs for many reasons (culture, class, religion, race etc.). Your “common sense” may not be that of your child, friend, spouse, lover etc. and vice versa.  If common sense was so very common when a person applied for and secured a job he or she wouldn’t need a job description. I applied for a job as a person, I understand what a janitor does so common sense should tell me I’m suppose to clean

If one never communicates what he or she expects unfortunately the expectations are empty and unhealthy.  Empty because this gives the argument “how was I suppose to know you expected that”. Unhealthy because if someone doesn’t satisfy your “expectation” it could cause you unnecessary stress.

Here are three things to consider doing when setting expectations that could be viewed as silent:

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in Business, Inspiration, Lifestyle

Cash is King; However, Credit Runs the World!

“Cash Rules Everything Around Me CREAM get the money… dollar, dollar bill y’all” – WuTang Clan

This statement holds a ring of truth… Cash is KING; however, CREDIT runs the world!

Have you ever asked yourself… What is my credit score? Why did I get denied for a loan? Why are my monthly payments so high?  You’re just lost in translation. At some point in life, you will want the answer to these questions and others concerning your financial well-being.  In order to answer these questions, you will first need to have clear understanding of what “credit” is.

In a nutshell, credit is an agreement that you enter into when you purchase something and then pay for it later.

A person with “good credit” has a history of paying for what they have purchased on-time, whereas a person with “challenged credit” has a less reliable record.

Keep in mind, it doesn’t take much to get into trouble with credit. A late payment here, a missed payment there, an account goes into collections, or even a season of overspending can lead to devastating effects to your credit and your credit score will suffer tremendously.  Trust me, I know first-hand.

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in Business, Inspiration, Lifestyle

Selfishly Finish Strong

It’s time to prepare for the second half of the year. No, we aren’t waiting until January to figure this out. We’re starting now. You know all the plans and dreams you had before life got in the way. Have you thought about what would make you a better you? What does your life look like for the remainder of the year? What do you need to take action to fulfill your dreams?

When 2018 started I had to get honest with myself and ask “what exactly does Takisha want? And how is she going to get it.”

Trust me there was a time I didn’t have any idea. I barely knew who Takisha was anymore. I didn’t have time to dream or think about anything but the present because it was always something else that needed to be taken care of. Then I didn’t feel emotionally ready to unload all the ideas and thoughts I had in my head. So I kept pushing it off until I eventually forgot about it and what I wanted. Don’t let this be you.

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in Inspiration, Lifestyle, Uncategorized

Do You Have Any Self-Compassion?

Surely you’ve heard the saying “we are our own worst critic”.  This sad but undeniable truth can oftentimes be more detrimental to our emotional health then we know.  There are instances when we are extremely hard or ourselves and we offer compassion to anyone but ourselves.  The idea of self-compassion is not a leeway to self-pity; instead, it’s intended to help us learn from what we perceive our mistakes are.  Consider this; if a close friend or your child were to share a situation they were really down on themselves about you’d have the ability to pull various positive aspects of their situation. You’d convey to them different approaches they could try in the future as well as what skill and or lessons they could learn from their situation.  Why is this process so difficult for individuals to implement? Check out this video I found by School of Life on YouTube.  Self-Compassion Exercise by, The School of Life 

You may also find the following emotional balancing tools useful when dealing with Self-compassionContinue reading

in Inspiration, Lifestyle, Uncategorized

Who are you waiting on to tell you you’re great?

You are the only one who can live the incredible life ahead of you. But you have to go for it. You have to stop holding on to what he, she, and they said. They don’t want what’s best for you. They want to say the meanest and cruelest things they think you might believe so you can start doubting your greatness. Once that little bit of doubt is planted, they know you’ll start questioning your full potential.

We’ve all had situations where life has gotten the best of us and we’ve had to crawl back to the top. Now that you’re at the top, don’t be the one to make you slide back down.

Seek your own validation, qualifications, and self-worth.

When people tell me their opinions about what I can and can’t do, sometimes I ignore them because obviously, they’re a non-f’ing factor. Other times I tell them to “kiss my a$$” and prove them wrong.

I’m not waiting for anyone to tell me I’m great. I tell myself that in the mirror when I put my moisturizer on.

If this is hard for you I need you to do one thing:

  1. Get give yourself a positive affirmation that you can pep talk yourself into believing. As Jay Z says “Let me be great”. Here’s an affirmation from my Affirmations Journal, “I am becoming who I dreamed of being.” You can get your copy on So stop waiting for someone to tell you who you are, you tell them.

“You are capable of achieving everything you want, you just have to work and believe it.”  

Just in case you still are waiting for someone to tell you to be great. There you go. #KiToldMe


in Family, Inspiration, Lifestyle

3 ways Not to Allow Resentment to Become a Silent Happiness Killer

Sometimes I wonder if the reason some people are so favorable to everyone because they support others with no regard for self.  Are you someone who has a habit of trying to accommodate others even when it’s a detriment to your own plans and or schedule? Don’t get me wrong selflessness is a good attribute to have (sometimes).  However, this character trait has the ability to be a double edge sword. If one isn’t careful it is very probable he or she will begin to build resentments.  Below outlines three ways not to allow resentment to build slowly and become a silent killer of your happiness.

  1. Say No. There are times when you would like to be accommodating and quite frankly you must say no. Meeting the needs of everyone in your life and they just so happened not to carry the same trait can build resentments. Have you ever heard the saying “treat others like you want to be treated”? This is a quote that I somewhat I agree and disagree with. Many people don’t share the same kind of character traits. It’s a bad idea to look for identical treatment in return, and those do will ultimately be disappointed.
  2. Communicate your feelings. It’s reasonable to make the decision to “pick your battles”. I would challenge you though, to weigh the possible outcome. Have you ever experienced “trying to keep the peace” and not mention an aggravation you encountered and every time you turn around you continue to have the experience until you go off?  Just when you’ve had enough the other party or parties appear to be oblivious to your irritation. Picking your battles doesn’t call for you to allow people, situations and or dislikes to hold you mentally hostage.  The earlier you communicate your feelings the sooner you can deal with the situation.
  3. Tell yourself yes. Treat yourself to something nice every and then. Depending on your life situation you are obligated to many responsibilities. The thing I’ve found to be a commonality is people tend to drop the ball to their most important responsibility, themselves.  This is not to offer advice to enter into irresponsible behavior. Even if you do something small, for example, getting a manicure once or twice a month or even taking yourself for coffee or lunch. Saying yes to yourself doesn’t mean you have to break the bank.  This practice gives you a sense of satisfaction for all the hard work and good you do.

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in Business, Family, Inspiration, Lifestyle

3 Ways to Balance Your Time

Between working, running a business, family life, and trying to not become a hermit I’m exhausted by Thursday. It takes a lot of effort to make sure that everything gets done. To make sure that my family doesn’t feel neglected, or the laundry gets done (this doesn’t count folding), I work on my business, and I find my selfish moments. I don’t try to do everything, I aim for balance. A little bit of this gets done, a bit of that can wait.

Here are a couple of ways to help you find balance as well:

1.      Ask for help. I’ve got so much vying for my attention that it’s a wonder I get anything done, but I let others know when I need help.

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